Masturbation for women - sex with someone you love

For many years it was OK for guys to masturbate to cool their sexual passions but women were not supposed to succumb to pleasuring themselves.  Fortuneatly those days are now long gone and women have as much right to this pleasure as men.

Sexual gratification for women is possibly a little more complex than for men.  Some women prefer to orgasm from clitoral stimulation whilst others enjoy vaginal penetration or g spot stimulation. Some women enjoy all three.  It's just a matter of choice at the time.  There's no right (or wrong way) to masturbate, everyone is different!

naked woman sitting with her hands around her kneesPreparation
It's the same for both men and women you need to give yourself the time and the right space to really enjoy the unique pleasures of masturbation.  A warm bath, a glass of wine and candlelight are a bit of a cliché but are hard to beat as ways to create the perfect environment for an evening of pleasure.

Make sure you are secure and in complete privacy, remove your clothes slowly touching yourself like a lover undressing you.  Don't forget the practicalities and turn off the phone (the last thing you need is a call from your mother/daughter/best friend just as you hit the first wave of galactic orgasm).

How to get the best orgasm ever
Your own imagination is always going to be the best stimulus to having beautiful sex.  The movie in your mind is so much better (and a great deal more relevant) than finest porn California can offer.  Most but by no means all, women react to pornography very differently from men.  This is because most (but by no means all) all of it is produced by exploitative, misogynistic men with all the imagination of a garden slug.

Your fantasies can be anything you want from an elaboration upon an exciting sexual encounter of the past to a secret desire for ‘forbidden' pleasures.  Nothing is forbidden, it's only you and you can have anything you want.

To vibrate or not to vibrate?
Easy one this, if vibrators do it for you then go ahead, get one or two or three.  If they don't then that's fine too.  However, don't knock it unless you have tried it.  They come in so many different shapes and sizes from the big, bright, multifunctional and frankly rather vulgar to the small, chic and fantastic.  Try them and see which is best for you.

What to do and how to do it
There are so many ways and techniques for giving yourself pleasure, most (if not all) of which are really intuitive.  Do what feels good and experiment gently and slowly.  Discover for yourself what floats your boat and keeps it that way.  Women have so many more ways than men to give themselves pleasure.  Here are some hints and suggestions.

Explore all parts of your body
Run your hands along your body, lingering on the areas that are more responsive to touch.  Caress the different parts to see what feels especially good.  Find and touch your inner and outer labia, your clitoris, your vagina and your perineum.  OMG, this may sound a bit like a biology text book, sorry!

Experiment
Try different types of touching and caressing.  Stroke, tickle, knead, pinch and rub.  Try using one or several fingers, the palm of your hand, even your knuckles.  Don't forget the pleasure of the pillow being gently squeezed between your thighs or the potential offered by the spine of a Booker Prize winning novel in hardback.  Both have very definite erotic possibilities.

Getting there and staying there
If your hand gets tired switch hands, or use your vibrator.  If you're on the brink of orgasm, but can't quite get there alter your breathing by taking deep breaths.  Give yourself some extra stimulation, caress or pinch your nipples or try raking your finger nails across your buttocks.

Remember, it's all for you and you can do it just the way you want.  As you begin to orgasm continue the stimulation gently through the orgasm all the way to those pleasurable little aftershocks.  With practise you will feel just how to pace yourself and get the most pleasure from your orgasm.  

Long term benefits
Some of you will find this helps you to learn more about yourself and the things that pleasure you.  So when you are with a partner again you will be better able to guide him towards what you like as well as being more responsive to his needs.  That sounds like a win win situation.

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