Making divorce easier for your children: Part One

Divorce is only about two things your children and your money.  It's not about the marriage and your reasons for wanting to divorce.  It's not about who did what and why one of you or maybe both of you feel you cannot continue with the marriage.

little girl with divorcing parentsLong term affects upon your children
The real issues are the wellbeing of the children and the division of the dosh (and the other family assets).  The effect upon the children can be catastrophic.  Many children appear to be able to cope with the consequences of divorce and it is only some time after that the damage this has caused them becomes apparent.

There are plenty more who will find it much more difficult and damaging from the start.  For some children the affects can be very long term and have a considerable impact upon their future relationships for the rest of their lives.

Key problems that children face
It is vital in a divorce where children are involved both the parents need to be aware of the impact that this is having on them. Here are some of the things that children will be faced with when their parents decide to get divorced.

1.  Children whose parents are getting divorced will be faced with the fact that nothing is going to be the same anymore.  The continuity of their lives has been broken.  They going to have to cope with either their mother or father no longer being around all the time and it could lead to them losing contact with other family members such as grandparents as well.

2.  These children will have to deal with the fear that they are being abandoned not just by the parent who is leaving.  For younger children the fear of being left alone is something that they will find traumatic.

3.  The tension between the parents will be felt by the children as well.  This will be very destabilising.  If you are unable to avoid keeping your feelings towards each under control in front of their children they will find it so much more difficult to cope with the situation.

Remember it's not just your divorce it's theirs too.



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