Not feeling particularly good about yourself after a divorce is hardly surprising but cutting yourself off from other people and retreating into solitude is a temptation all too easy to give in to.
Maintaining your social life after getting divorced
So many of us have been there, unable to muster up the energy to maintain a social life after getting divorced and not able to see the point of talking to anyone, feeling unwanted, unloved and quite frankly, wallowing in our own misery like a hippo in a mud bath.
What you need now is the support of family and friends. Absolutely the worst thing you can do is to sit at home alone torturing yourself about what went wrong or who your ex is sleeping with, such introspection will not help.
What not to do after getting divorced
Avoid spending sprees, comfort eating and one-night stands which may bring temporary relief from ongoing doom and gloom but will have absolutely no long lasting benefits.
Having a meal with work colleagues, walking the dog with a family member or going to the cinema with friends can be the first steps to establishing a routine of socialising for yourself without being part of a couple.
Try not to divide mutual friends up into yours and theirs, like the furniture. Don't assume that people will be vying to choose sides between you and your former husband or wife. Mostly they are feeling rather embarrassed and uneasy hoping not to have to make the choice.
Keep as many relationships going as possible
If you open up to those who have been there for you in the past you could be pleasantly surprised at their reactions. Keeping on good terms with your in-laws if at all possible is important, particularly where children are involved. You don't want to come out of your shell to realise you have unwittingly alienated the children from their grandparents or other relatives. Keeping the contacts open on all fronts means your children won’t feel they have to take sides either.
So get yourself ready for a night out, pick up the phone and make contact with the outside world. Once you have enjoyed some regular support from old friends and family, your confidence will start to return and before long, you’ll be ready to meet new people and make new friends.
Dating after divorce
A great way of finding those in the same boat as you is to visit our great dating site which could provide a useful way to meet like minded people. You can take things at your own pace and there’s no pressure to do anything you don’t want to. It’s about having fun and forgetting the stress of your divorce.
The more relationship connections you keep and foster now, the easier and better your life after divorce will be. It's a case of making the effort and there's no denying it's not easy to do. Remember you don't have a sign on your forehead saying 'Divorced person.' You are bright, attractive, interesting and ready for a new life after divorce.